Thursday, 11 July 2013

Dating Post Divorce

I often read articles all about how it's ok to be alone after a divorce.  How it's good to find yourself, become more self aware, learn to be alone.

What a load of cruddy bollocks.

My view is this.  I don't want to immediately settle down again.  But what I do see is that I have an opportunity now that I've never had before.  Yes, of course, I was single in the past but when you're young, you're on the hunt for a mate.  You're programmed to look for someone who you can procreate with, a suitable match, and have children before your body clock gives up.  You bag a man, get a ring on his finger, get up the duff - job done.

Now, I've had my kids thank you very much.  I just want to have fun.  I want to be wined and dined, and have the most fantastic sex.  I want to see all sorts of different people, and then, maybe, in a few years' time, make a choice about whether to settle and who with.

Internet dating supports this concept.  You are not going to limit yourself to talking to just one person at a time.  You are going to communicate with several, see a few, and probably get to know 2 or 3, within the same timescale.  If you are particularly moral, you would choose one to date.

I say meh to that.  I don't think it is immoral to date several guys at this stage in life.  It's a different game.  The rules are different, expectations different, outcomes different.  A note on honesty; if I'm asked, I will be honest.  I will ask if it's a problem (as most of the time, it transpires that they are doing it too).  It's early days, but I think that if someone says it does pose a problem, then I will have to make a choice on whether to pare down my chums, or whether to say goodbye to that individual.

Having said all of this, my date tonight blew me out.  Gah!  So I AM alone, with my lonely curry for one, and my popcorn, and my crap TV.  Pfffffft.

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